The round, doughnut shaped structures are stomata...the tiny spaces on a leaf that let gasses in and out. The kids were looking at this as part of our plant unit, and they made the slide themselves! 

Two of my kids...looking as though they are auditioning for the new DORF video...or maybe the Oompa Loompa's need some new friends... 

Assault With A Deadly What?

Assault on a teacher should be pretty serious business, but, unfortunately, my Southern Accent has prevented appropriate action on what should have been a criminal act.

Suffice to say, I was wholly unprepared for the attack in the hall yesterday. The surprise was greater than the pain. I didn't even see it coming, but I felt it, a sharp pain to my left elbow. The kids around me immediately went silent, and I, being of sharp wit, conducted a complete vicinity burn. All of the kids in the area were sent directly into my classroom.

All of the James Patterson and Patricia Cornwell novels I've read have taught me many things, mainly that if evidence and witnesses get away, the crime gets that much harder to solve.

I began asking questions quickly, and determined my primary suspect. The suspect was coming down the hall just after the incident, and I pulled him in my room as well. He denied everything, of course, but after a little "Bad Cop" routine, and a quick mention of possible juvenile detention for conducting a violent act, he caved, and became strangely apologetic. I sent the other kids out, and had my suspect sit down.

He was trembling with fear as I called the office to find out the procedure for assault on a teacher. Unfortunately, the secretary doesn't understand my accent over the phone, and initially thought I said, "THOUGHT" on a teacher...which makes no sense. I said "assault" again, and she responded with "THONG? Thong on a teacher?" I ended up spelling it, and she screamed with laughter when she figured it out. The principal happened to be standing near her desk and she explained that a student had thrown an object at me, and that I had been assaulted. The principal wanted to know what was thrown, so the secretary asked me.

I responded with: A MUFFIN.

The secretary was hysterical, and made me laugh in front of the kid I was playing Bad Cop with. The principal was all business, though, and wanted me to see the nurse before I wrote the kid up. That made me laugh even more.

Long story longer...I sent the kid back to class scared to death that he would soon be interviewed by the police. I took the deadly muffin up to the office, and wrote the kid up, attaching the muffin to the write up form. I then presented it to the secretary and said, "We're going to have to get over our cultural differences over the phone if I'm going to effectively discipline children. I mean really, THONG ON A TEACHER?"

We laughed the rest of the afternoon, in fact, I'm still laughing at it. However, my left elbow IS a little sore from the muffin impact. I'm just so thankful that the muffin didn't contain nuts...I could have ended up in surgery to remove the pecan shrapnel.

Are purple hearts given for any wound while in service...or do you have to take a bullet specifically?

A Quick Visit, and also...Bo.

Dad was here tonight for a quick visit and got to see the house. We met the real estate agent there and she told us that the appraisal went fine. We've got to have two more inspections...one for pests, and one for the flat roof that is on the addition...and then we can start preparing to close. If everything works out, we may close in a couple of weeks, otherwise, we'll wait until the end of June.

Also...Bo Bice was awesome tonight. I've haven't like him very much up until now, but I think he's the one that's going to win American Idol.

As my father says: TTFN (Ta Ta For Now!)

Superglue...

If you could, please touch your middle finger to your thumb on your right hand. Now, pretend that you couldn't pull that apart.

I was gluing something this morning, and inadvertently glued my fingers together. I read the warning on the package, and tried very hard to be careful, but somehow, the glue still got on me, and permanently adhered my fingers together.

After an initial panic, I realized simultaneously two things: a) I could probably get them apart without going to the hospital, if I tried hard enough, and b) I was glad no one else was awake yet.

After twenty minutes of scalding hot water, and working my fingers back and forth, I managed to separate my fingers and lose only a little skin. The hot water hurt worse than pulling the skin apart.

I expect a full recovery, and, as I rarely get any sympathy, and am thus conditioned to not having it, I am mostly over it now. (If there were a chance for real sympathy, though, I would glue my whole hand to my back...)

Anyway...that's my Sunday so far.

Uneventful Saturday...

Not a lot going on. In fact, I slept quite a bit today. Ever since I had my cavity filled last week, I've had a headache. The tooth is still kind of sore, but the doctor said the nerve could take three to six months to heal. With all of the Tylenol, I'll need a liver transplant by the time the tooth is healed! At any rate...the perpetual ache is keeping me a little run down.

My dad's coming up Tuesday. Hopefully, he'll be able to see the house while he's here.

Liz put an ad in the Buffalo News today and tomorrow. It shows a picture and description of our house down there, in case anyone's moving down. We're hoping it will sell soon, it's becoming a burden as each day creeps by. When I was down in March, there didn't seem to be as many houses on the market in the neighborhood...so maybe the tide is turning...let's hope so at least.

I've posted some new pictures of the baby, as well as some I took this morning of Barb and Doug's Apple Tree. I think I'm going to submit the one Apple Blossom pic to the Weather Channel and see if they take it.

What a hard life Siobhan leads...playing, eating, playing, eating, sleeping... 

Siobhan laughs ALL the time now... 

All of the girls...Siobhan, Caitlin, Patti, and Maureen... 

Maureen and Patti with Siobhan. 

A single Blossom... 

The Apple Tree in Bloom... 

More of the Apple Blossoms... 

This was on Yahoo! photos today...I just thought it was neat. The caption with it read: A white peacock displays its feathers in a bird park in Amman May 10, 2005. Hundreds of visitors, especially students, visit the bird park daily. REUTERS/Ali Jarekji
 

Renee Rogers?

Evidently, over the weekend, Renee Zellweger got married to country music singer Kenny Chesney.

Liz, upon hearing the news, was congratulatory, but misheard the groom's name, and thought for a time that Renee had married Kenny Rogers.

I just thought it was funny...

A picture that one of my students drew of me. I'm thinking the art teacher needs to be consulted on what looks like a creative emergency...

This is the guide dog for one of my students. His name is Gabe, and he's in my classroom everyday. He just lies down, and doesn't move until class is over. 

Whelk Egg Cases

I'm posting pictures of an enrichment lesson I did last week. The kids opened up Whelk egg cases to see the tiny shells inside. We've been working on Animal Classification, and I thought this would be a neat extension. I called Lauren Hunter, whose sister Bonnie is a ferry boat captain on the Outer Banks. She got her sister to collect some whelk egg cases for us, and she sent them up a couple of weeks ago. The kids were SO excited and were able to take the tiny shells and the egg case remains home.

A knobbed whelk, with the egg cases from Lauren's sister Bonnie. 

A close up of the egg case with the tiny channeled whelks that were inside it. 

Sand fleas had gotten into one of the egg cases...the kids were SO excited! 

One of the kids used the shells to spell his name... 

Working to break the cases open. 

Looking at the tiny shells close up. 

Inspection's Done!

We did the inspection on the house today, and it was mostly okay. There were a couple of small issues that we are asking concessions for, but overall, the appraisal is our last obstacle. The chimney needed some attention, and the electric meter needs to be moved outside. Otherwise, plumbing, furnace, roof...everything else is ready to go! I've added some new pictures below:

A Better view of the front.

Another view of the front... 

View from the back, with pool, and concrete barbeque pit. The girls are going to LOVE all of this grass! 

The "Florida" room... 

Better view of the kitchen. 

Another view of the kitchen. 

Entrance to the "In-Law" Apartment and the shed. 

April Showers Bring What?

It seems that in Buffalo, April Showers bring May Snow! We had some sleet this morning, and it's supposed to snow tonight. (Not much, but at this point, I'm happy with anything!)

That translates to just four months without snow: June, July, August, and September.

I LOVE IT!

Surprise! We Bought A House!

We're now a 2 mortgage family...and thus we will accept donations of non-perishable items.

We put in a bid on the house pictured below, and it was accepted yesterday. We signed all the paperwork today, and barring the inspection and appraisal, it's ours.

It's about two miles from Doug and Barb, it's got a pool, two bathrooms, and an extra addition that's like an apartment, complete with its own entrance. There's a huge double lot yard and we are overjoyed that we were able to do this.

Now, we MUST sell that house in Kannapolis, so if you know of anyone in need of a house, have them let Kannapolis Real Estate know...SOON!

Enjoy the pictures...we'll take more later.

Have a good night!

-Mike