$316.81

Oh, Happy Day.

8:30 AM - Wake up refreshed.

9:00 AM - Scrounge for food. Find some fruit to eat for breakfast. (Maraschino Cherries in a jar...I poured the juice off, though.) I also had two pickles.

9:15 AM - Watch the three hour TV presentation of Stephen King's "Desperation" in 45 minutes. Fast forwarded through it because it stank, but I wanted to see the ending.

10:00 AM - Called the cable company about how much they overcharge us. Argued with them for about 1/2 an hour with no results.

10:30 AM - Went outside in the back yard to sweep off the back porch and straighten up.

11:30 AM - Hear Liz inside yelling for me to come inside quickly. I walk through the back door, hear my toilet gurgle, then watch is it begins to fill up. I notice my shower is full of a brownish water, and still am heading toward Liz.

11:31 AM - Walk into Liz's bathroom to see her toilet overflowed and her bathtub full of dark water.

11:35 AM - Call Barb and Doug to relay the tragedy and cancel our plans for X-Men 3. (The most tragic part of our day!)

11:45 AM - Talk to the good people at Roto-Rooter, who tell us someone will be there in three hours or so.

3:45 PM - The Roto-Rooter guy extracts what looks like gray, hairy glue from our pipes and comments on how this probably hasn't been done in years. (He also said there were no roots in the pipeline...thank goodness!)

4:45 PM - Everything is flowing normally except the bathroom sink, which the Roto-Rooter guy also has to snake. (For an additional fee of course...)

5:10 PM - I sign my name to a check to the Roto-Rooter man for $316.81, which includes $182 for the outside snake, and the rest for the inside snake.

5:11 PM - Decide to move back home to live with parents. Being an adult is too expensive.